OK, three tries.
Car is 94% @ 189 miles not plugged in. Note that 94% @ 189 = 200 miles, so the reading should change unless I was at exactly 201 miles per charge.
Turn IGN on.
Wait for complete boot.
Quickly press brake and throttle to floor at the same time barefoot (so I can feel more).
Hold for 30 seconds.
Turn off. Wait for headlights to shut off. Try again. No effect. Turn off. Wait for headlights, then try it with IGN off. No effect. Turn IGN on, try again, no effect.
So I'm not going crazy then right?!?